Introduction

Your loved ones have lied to you.

From an early age your parents, friends, siblings, and teachers shaped your view of the world. Without being aware of it, we decide what they’re saying and their understanding of the world is the correct way.

If we’re not aware of it, it’s hard to challenge the limiting beliefs of others.

It wasn’t to fool you or ruin your future but rather to keep you safe. In the past, you’ve either failed after trying your very best or someone told you it’s not possible and it’s okay to give up. 

Once you keep hearing this, you tend to find things that confirm that it’s not possible.

If you’re reading this then I know you’re not satisfied and know that you can do more. You must be willing to go through uncertainties, question your beliefs, and challenge yourself.

Try asking yourself whenever you think you can’t do something “What if I’m wrong?”

Setting Yourself Free for Success and Growth

I’ve wasted 10+ years of my life, making me feel like a loser.

It’s frustrating to see no progress even after you’ve done what you could. I’ve let opportunities slip through my hands and also noticed becoming comfortable after seeing a small success, just to fall back to zero.

It’s hard and painful to look back at your past mistakes and confirm your flaws.

When you’re trying to improve, self-doubt, fear, uncertainty and feelings of hopelessness will come up.  Unless you find out what’s stopping or holding you back, you’re journey to live a fulfilling life and achieve success will always fall short.

So let’s go through some of the top 10 beliefs that I encountered in, especially in my 20s.

Hopefully, you can see this and fix it ASAP to make your journey much smoother than mine.

Limiting Belief 1: “I’m Too Old to Learn Something New”

This one’s simple to destroy yet we overthink it.

Trying something new and sucking at it, in the beginning, is probably the hardest struggle to overcome.

On top of that, every day we can see people younger than us earning big dough and becoming financially free. So we convince ourselves we missed the boat and think to ourselves if we had just started earlier, and now it’s too late.

When you start thinking this way you might as well dig your own grave.

Quote somepeople die at age

Studies have shown that people who retired early(age 50-55) had a higher risk of death (60%) than those who retired later (age 60- 65). And it basically boiled down to one sentence: an active mind keeps humans healthy.

I was late to start learning SEO or Copywriting. But the things I learned are crucial in my day-to-day life.

• Persuasion
• Adaptability
• Researching skills
• Time Management
• Human Psychology
• Dealing with feedback

These skills have helped me navigate better in my day-to-day life.

• Negotiating salary
• Handling arguments
• Dealing with problems
• Keeping track of my goals
• Not letting my ego control me
• being proactive with my health

When you keep learning, you get to explore more possibilities.

Limiting Belief 2: “I’m Not Talented Enough”

Yeah, can’t help you there buddy. 

Talent does count, it makes it much easier to progress quickly and build momentum. It amazes me when some people can learn a new language 10x faster than me with 1/4th of the effort.

Almost all my life I’ve been mediocre at things. 

But hey out of all the millions of sperm racing towards the egg I have triumphed. 

But what about people who have talents that we call naturals, gifted, geniuses, and prodigies? Do they immediately become the best and those without cannot succeed?

Unfortunately, talented individuals(like myself) can’t relax on their advantages. 

Or else a disciplined person will bite them on their ass. If talent mattered so much then there really is no use for all these competitions. Why do people love dark horses? Because it’s exciting to see someone less talented teardown people better than them.

Talent matters but not as much as effort.

Limiting Belief 3: “Bad Things Always Happen To Me”

“Nothing goes my way”, “I’m always left disappointed”, “I shouldn’t have any expectations”

This was ignorant of me to think the world revolves around me. I lost 65K on gambling, was laid off from a job that I really liked for a lame reason, and got a random boner when it was my turn for the presentation.

My motivation to improve my life faded away, so there’s no point in even trying.

Looking back to it now that’s unfortunate but honestly…it isn’t that bad.

Worst things have happened to good people and most of the time the world is a shitty place. That’s why people are looking for happiness, which makes them even more miserable. 

They fail to appreciate what they have.

When bad things happen you move on, when good things happen you still move on.

Limiting Belief 4: “I Need to Have Everything Figured Out”

Oh yes, this is the one I got stuck on the most.

At age 25 I had this huge burden to have things figured out already and on which direction I should be heading towards in my life. I kept on thinking and learning new skills, buying online courses, and finally figuring out almost nothing.

You’re not supposed to figure out life.

You should be looking to enjoy the experience. I used to always think in what ifs and it nearly drove me mad.

• If I could just have this job.
• If I can just find that special someone.
• If only I knew what my purpose/passion was.

Do things that are relatively close to your interests or think will be useful to YOU in the future. and stop trying to find the BEST plan, time is scarce so figuring things out is to do rather than to think.

Stop chasing the next shiny object or the “cool” thing to do.

Limiting Belief 5: “Change Is Too Hard”

Stop whining you little bit*h. 

As I said to myself after going on a guy’s night out talking about our carefree past. How fun it was and then proceeding to complain about the difficulties of adulthood. After that continuing my miserable life “hoping” it would magically change someday.

If you’re unsatisfied with your life right now then it’s your fault. 

What you’re doing is not working.

It’s plain stupidity to do the same thing and expect different results. It was very uncomfortable being honest about my past mistakes, but it made me realize.

“In the same way that my past actions have shaped my present, my future could also change by what I do now.”

What if I’m satisfied? Is change really necessary?

You may not be bothered by the responsibilities that will come up with changes and prefer living a simple life.

Nothing wrong with that but at the same time you must be willing to change when necessary.

•Amazon was originally a bookstore before it decided to pivot

•Blockbuster didn’t want to change their old ways and got replaced by Netflix

•Robert Downey Jr spent decades in and out of rehab, sobering up, and slipping up before becoming Iron Man

Don’t be surprised when things around you start to change and be left behind.

Limiting Belief 6: “I Can’t Take Risks”

Our brain is strictly “programmed” to keep us safe.

It’s an expert at finding excuses for why you shouldn’t do it.

People do more to avoid pain than to gain pleasure. At the same time you know that unless you take certain risks, you cannot grow and create new opportunities. Take calculated risks by asking yourself “How badly will this affect me?” and trust me on this, most of the time the thing you’re fearing won’t even happen.

We let our emotions get the best of us instead of logically thinking about it.

Avoiding risks isn’t being smart, it’s a slow painful road to depression. Playing it safe will only get you mediocre results and destroy your potential. One day you’ll find losing trust in yourself always having to rely on someone else.

Ask yourself “How can I handle it if it doesn’t work out?”. 

Limiting Belief 7: “I’m Not Worthy of Success”

I find myself saying this whenever I make a small breakthrough or an achievement.

“I haven’t done anything great or worthy”

“I’m not an expert and I’m not brilliant. I just got lucky”

“I can’t let myself enjoy this success, it’s not worth being proud of”

I realized this came from my perfectionism and not being happy with the small wins. When someone said it was amazing how I achieved that, I would always say it could’ve been better. I was always looking for others’ acknowledgment that I was enough, so I never was glad for any small successes.

Although proving haters wrong is a great motivator.

You find yourself chasing something “praiseworthy” to show off your “worthiness”. This cycle will never end, seeking approval from others will make you feel empty inside and it’s a sign of someone with low self-esteem.

Limiting Belief 8: “Money will bring me happiness”

YES, but not in the way most people think.

If you weren’t happy inside then having great wealth won’t make it any better. Be aware that your core happiness won’t be any stronger with that wealth, and while you want something, you can’t be content with what you have.

Money is a wonderful thing it gives you options, to buy luxury items, travel to different countries, and get a hair transplant… Anyway, money can fix problems and prevent most of the troubles. Not living paycheck to paycheck is everyone’s ideal.

But at the same time why wait for the money to come to be happy?

Isn’t happiness an emotion? And aren’t emotions fickle that they can change every hour of the day? Always chasing the next pleasure and wanting something because it looks nice or they seem to be having fun on social media. Sounds kind of sad to me.

Pleasures make life great and to enjoy pleasures we need money. 

But since such pleasures are hard to get, that’s what makes the experience so enjoyable. If your pleasure is to eat at fine dining restaurants every time then soon the newness will wear off.

Living in luxury would without a doubt make me happy. But as long I’m not having to deal with cockroaches running around my apartment and I can sip on my black coffee while playing chess. 

I’m happy with that as well.

Limiting Belief 9: “I’m not ready yet”

Similar to thinking you’re not good enough, but this one is trying to over prepare so let me explain.

A friend of mine was learning programming with plans to switch careers. He took online courses, did all the assignments, and got good enough to use that knowledge to make a recipe finder and typing speed test games.

But…

Instead of trying to start applying for jobs and going through interviews.

He told me “I still need to learn this and that”.

Now I’m not saying, I’m an expert at helping others find a new job, especially in the field of computer science. But one thing I do know is unless you try applying, going through the interview, and getting feedback. You won’t be making valuable progress.

As a matter of fact, how will you even know if you’re ready to be hired by the company?

I’m sure you know a couple of people who got jobs through connection while meeting 20% of the requirements. Job posters where put up requirements of at least 2 years of experience or increased 30% profit on your previous company for entry-level jobs.

So stop trying to delay and convince yourself “Now’s not the right time”

You’ll never know when life will throw you a nasty curveball on your blind spot. Don’t wait for the stars to align perfectly you never know if she/he may agree to go on a date with you.

Better get it over with and not stalling your valuable time.

Limiting Belief 10: “I’m not smart enough”

Anyone here who scored 97 on a test and still got scolded?

Or anyone who got a score of 60 and their parents were shocked? 

Did you know that a high IQ doesn’t mean you’ll succeed and do great things? Being intelligent means you are capable of coming up with many solutions and ideas but at the same time, you tend to overanalyze. 

Curse of high IQ

• Find it hard to sympathize/empathize with others
• Become overly harsh on their performance
• Only thinking in terms of Black &White

Being aware that you’re not smart enough is uplifting.

Now you will be able to judge what you can and cannot improve about yourself. Play on your strengths and cut your weaknesses first.

The Dunning-Kruger Effect

Studies show competent people underestimate their intelligence or are insecure about it. While incompetent people will overestimate their intelligence.

Smart people are clever enough to know how much they don’t know and the less intelligent don’t have the ability to recognize what they’re lacking.

To Conclude

In many ways, we can be our own worst enemies.

As you approach your 30s, it’s important to identify and challenge the limiting beliefs that may be holding you back. It takes time to overcome these limiting beliefs(I’m still processing them) but slowly I have begun to see its rewards. 

I refuse to let life pass me by and begun to believe more in myself.

Make the most out of your limited time. Stop accepting these limits on yourself and letting the negativity around you/the world overwhelm you.